Thursday, December 10, 2009

Experiencing a Form of Living Hell In Motherhood

Today's Gospel Reading
Mathew 11:16-19
"Now to what can I compare the people of this day? They are like children sitting in the marketplace. One group shouts to the other." Mathew 11:16

Oh goodness, this gospel reading is perfect for what is on my mind. Does this gospel reading say it all or what? How perfect for us mothers on a comparison to the people of this day. We know all too well what it is like to have children in a marketplace....shouting to one another. Recently I have found myself in a moment of fall to my knees suffering or for better words, living hell. The other day I had an 8 hour trip ahead of me by myself with my three children (4,2,1) hell in my mind before the trip even started! After my mother transported us two hours to where my car was parked, I was loading all of our luggage in 10 degree weather and knowing I had 6 hours left. My children were screaming and I was in living hell at that very moment. Tonight, Clint is working late and I came home with a disaster at my feet...train tracks strung all over the floor, laundry piled on the dining table, kitchen dishes piled high from baking for the neighbors and it was bedtime. Thankfully my neighbor fed my kids dinner and me wine so we were in a better state of mind than normal. My daughter, Clementine (2), falls from the car and face plants into the cement floor. I have never seen a blue goose egg so big. I was actually very worried for once! As she was screaming and wanting an ice pack, my 1 year old was screaming because she had not had a nap and was ready for bed. My 4 year old was asking me where a certain toy was and about that time, Clementine accidently poked me in the eye. Have you ever had your eye poked before? It hurts like SO bad! I couldn't do anything but put my hand over my eye and bare the pain. At that very moment, as all three children were crying I was in a form of living hell.

So yes, we mothers do know how to compare to the people of this day. We have been in the marketplace with children screaming at each other and yes we do, from time to time, experience living hell on earth. But sometimes I find myself in the midst of living hell giggling. It is almost comical at that very moment. If I am not laughing, I am crying and singing "Jesus, Remember Me When you Come Into Your Kingdom"! I know at the moment of a dose of living hell, that that is the moment of sanctification. That is the moment I carry my cross and grow closer to holiness. I actually embrace those moments as they are happening and know I will be a better mother and person for it. It is amazing to me the bond that mothers have......there is no one else but mothers that could understand what I just wrote. I know you all are laughing at this very moment and feeling a little more at ease that there is another mother out there that loses her mind and experiences a form of living hell just by the simple act of being a mother. Oh the joys of motherhood.....our pathway to Heaven!

Blessings to you this Friday!


Trasa said...

Kim, Father Richard told me in reconciliation this week that patience was a very hard thing to come by, and that even the saints had a difficult time with patience. He said if I perservere, I will be a saint, guaranteed! So I pray that for you, that you know at those moments, that there is an opportunity for sanctification and an opportunity to become a little bit closer to sainthood. We won't always make it, but with God's help, we can inch closer...

Kim Venneman Cooper said...

Thank you, Trasa, for your encouragement. What powerful words to ponder on from Father Richard. Whoo, makes me feel a lot better! You are such an inspiration for me on my faith journey. You radiate with God's love through your eyes, your voice and your actions. You have a way about you that I just can't explain. I am so blessed to know you.